THE BIG DAY....

So Finally it was the big day - Transfer Day!!! It seems as if we have been waiting for this day for what seems like forever, I can't believe it has finally come! It was a wonderful day. My mom came with me because Brandon had to work, and Kendra's mom came with her as well. It was so nice having the moms there. So they took us all into this small operating-like room. It was a lot more "medical" than I imagined it would be. I had to put on a gown and lay down on this crazy table. The doctor came in and said that both the embryos thawed nicely and my lining looked "beautiful". Perfect! The doctor put in a small catheter and then an even smaller catheter within that one to place the embryos in my uterus. We got to watch the whole time on the ultrasound screen, and with one little blast, both embryos went in . We even all got pictures from the ultrasound machine! It was such a big moment. I was so nervous going into the day, but during the whole procedure (which was only a couple minutes) I was calm and in awe of what was happening. What an amazing experience! And now I feel the weight of the world on my shoulders. I am carrying around the most precious thing in the world to Kendra and Tony. It is such a massive responsibility. I am on a couple of days modified bed-rest and then my blood pregnancy test is scheduled for 10 days from now (I think I'll test earlier though at home, just to be prepared). So now the wait is on (once again!). Hopefully the embryos will implant in the next couple of days, and I will have good news to follow!

PIO shots - getting ready for the transfer!

So I ended up having to do the PIO shots (progesterone in oil). These are the bad ones! In the picture is the Lupron shot (on the bottom) which goes in the stomach - no big deal, and doesn't really hurt at all. The TOP one is the PIO. It goes in your butt area and because it is in oil, you have to massage it and put on a heating pad afterwards to prevent the oil from pooling up under your skin. Brandon happened to be at the Indy 500 when I needed the first one, so luckily my dad was willing to come over and stab me! I was SO scared, but it actually didn't hurt as bad as I thought it would. Brandon took over a few days later :)
So here's my medicine list:
Baby Aspirin and prenatal vitamins every day
PIO shot (1 ml) every other day
Lupron shot (.25) every day
Estraderm patches (change every few days - sometimes 1 sometimes 4)
Estrace vaginal suppository (1 pill 2 x a day)
Endometrin vaginal suppository (1 pill 3 x a day)
Z pack antibiotics
Gee- I think that's it - haha. So our transfer is scheduled for May 28th - YAY!!!!
I didn't think this day would ever come!
I am scared it will work - I'm scared it won't work - I have such conflicting emotions. But above everything else I feel, I just hope hope hope that this works the first time. I will feel just terrible if K & T have to endure yet another dissppointment. My mom is coming with because Brandon has to work, and her mom is coming too, so that is exciting and fun. I can't wait!!!! Wish me some luck.....

Appointment #2 - check!

So appointment #2 went pretty good. Another ultrasound and blood-work. The only issue the doctor had was my lining was only just above the minimum level they like to see. The tech also said there was a tiny bit of fluid in there, so hopefully that will just absorb and not be an issue. They increased one of my medications and I need to go back in a few days for another ultrasound to see if that corrects the problem.

Also, I was informed that I will indeed need to start the PIO (progesterone in oil) injections :( Boo! They originally said I wouldn't have to do that one, but apparantly the doctor has changed his protocol. They are supposed to be really painful and go right into the muscle of your butt. Brandon will have to give them to me. I won't have to start them for another week or so though. I was such a baby about the Lupron injection - and that was nothing compared to this! It should really be a scene :)

1st appt down!

So the first appointment went really well. I had to go downtown to the fertility clinic for bloodwork and an ultrasound. The doctor needed to make sure everything is a certain level so that I could continue on the medication schedule. I received the phone call later that afternoon that everything is a go! So I now have to start an estrogen patch and pill, as well as taking baby aspirin, as well as continuing the lupron injection. Next week they check again to see how my levels and uterus lining is progressing. Crossing my fingers no issues so we can keep the transfer date of May 28th!!!

lawyers, contracts, injections, oh my...

So they finally arrived... all of my medications for this cycle! Before I could get them to mail me all of these lovely pills, shots, patches, etc., we had to make sure all of the contracts were signed by both Brandon and myself, our lawyer, Kendra and Tony, and their lawyers as well. It was a really quick process and we got the paperwork together right away. The contracts basically consist of a lengthy explanation of how the compensation works, including addressing a lot of the "what-ifs". For example, what if the baby has severe abnormalities, what if there ends up being multiple babies, what if I DIE and need to be put on life support in order to save the baby (morbid!), and most importantly, what if the baby ends up not belonging to me OR THE PARENTS!! WHAT?! And I guess that DOES happen sometimes. Sometimes the clinic messes up and inserts the wrong embryo. Umm, yeah - somebody should be getting fired for that little mistake! The most important part of the contract for Brandon would be the part that states that we must, ahem "refrain from activity" that may result in pregnancy for the entire month before the transfer - sorry honey!!! Lawyer/Dr.'s orders!

There was nothing surprising in the contract though and after it was signed I got to start the fun stuff - injections. So I'm thinking, no big deal. I have never been afraid of needles or pain, so whatever. Well, that was before I had a sharp pointy object aimed at my stomach. Brandon sat there laughing at me - every time I would go to stab myself, I would hesitate millimeters from my skin - I could NOT make myself do it! So, being the man he is, he quickly grabbed it from me and shoved it in (as I am screaming "How could you do this to me??"). Turns out it didn't really hurt at all, and I am now able to give it to myself no problem. I get a shot a night for the next month. The drug is called Lupron which apparently shuts down my ovary function so that I don't ovulate during the cycle. Knock on wood, no side effects yet!

The other great thing is I met up with Kendra for lunch, and I had a wonderful time! I was nervous that maybe when we met one-on-one she wouldn't like me as much as she had thought. But it went really well and we had really good conversations. So that makes me that much more excited to move on with this and to do this for them.

The next step involves weekly ultrasounds and bloodowork, as well as starting the rest of the meds. I'll update with each appointment :)

Moving forward!

To my surprise the mom called me today and told me that it's a go! They both talked it over with their families and decided that despite my added risk, they still want me to be their surrogate :) WOW - now it is real - I am excited, nervous, anxious, a hundred things. I am thrilled that they think so much of me that they are willing to continue with me, but at the same time I am sad that I have to put their little babies in extra harms way because of my issue. I want to be a surrogate to help a couple, not add an additional hurdle to their quest to be parents. But I know (and they know too) that as long as mother nature cooperates, I will do everything I can to care for their baby as if it were my own. After all of this waiting these last couple of months, now it seems to be going so fast! The next step is to meet with an attorney and work out the contracts and after that is all done, I have to start on the medications to get myself ready for the transfer. So onto the contract phase....

Evals.....

So the first step in getting evaluated to be a surrogate is getting a psychological test done with a psychologist at the fertility clinic. So, I expect to go in, answer a few questions, and find out I am indeed not crazy! Well, talking to her was fine. Then she hands me a booklet and Scantron sheet and asks me to go home and fill it out and mail it to her. OK - that's not too hard. WELL, almost 600 true/false questions later, I am beginning to question my sanity! And not just typical are you crazy questions - this odd test has ones like "Would you like to become a florist?", "Have you ever stalked somebody?", "Have you ever tried to kill somebody?", "Are you afraid of earthquakes?" - HUH?????? And of course I over-analyze every question. Well, I am not afraid of earthquakes here, but yeah, I guess I *would* be afraid if one ever happened - how do you answer that?? But I finished it up and sent it in and again...wait around.

About 3 weeks later I was informed that I passed (phew!) and then I was able to transfer all of my records to the fertility doctor and make my appointment for my medical evaluation. After waiting about 2 weeks for them to call me I finally get a call from the agency saying there is a problem. In my medical records it states that I have a septated uterus. I had been told this a few years ago and was going to have it further checked out when I found out I was pregnant with Leo, so I never did. And since I got pregnant 3 times total and had 2 full term normal pregnancies, I never though anything of it. WELL, the fertility doctor sees it as a big problem, and after going back and forth and waiting an additional week, they finally agreed to see me and check it out. A septum is just a piece of tissue on the wall of the uterus and the problem is that if the embryo implants on this area, it will die because there is no blood flow there. So, anyhow, they finally allowed me to make my appointment, which involves a saline sonogram, where they inject saline into your uterus and watch it on an ultrasound machine to see what is there. So you need to have it on a certain day of your cycle, and they needed me to start birth control pills first. So I was able to make the appointment for almost a month later.

The appointment wasn't bad at all. Brandon had to come with because we both were supposed to sign forms and get blood work done, so I had him come back to the room for the exam with me. I didn't know, however, that it would be a full exam - everything off and into a dreaded paper gown. I don't think he has recovered after seeing that exam - haha :) He sat in the corner the whole time with a magazine covering his face. My bad! At least now he knows what us girls have to go through!

The results of the appointment were that I didn't have an actual septum, but a "dimple" as the doctor called it. But the good news was that it was the best kind of problem to have, meaning that I could still go on to be a surrogate. The only thing is, the parents would have to agree to still go with me and realize that there was an additional 5-10% chance of miscarriage. And the doctor was very against me having it removed, because he believed that doing surgery would make the problem worse and affect my own fertility. So that was it - if they decided to still go with me and my risk, I would do it. If they decided against it, the whole thing was over for me. And OF COURSE this has happened on a Friday, so now I have to sit around all weekend and just await their decision. I'm so nervous!!!! But it's out of my hands now....